I had a talk with a close friend tonight.. another submissive... I've always respected her... she had said some things that made me feel a bit better... not much... but they did...

"... it's how I've come to see D/s relationships... that submissives are here to be counterpoint to Dominants - kind of the light to Their dark... we need Them but will wait for Them... They need us to keep Their dark sides in check... They offer us comfort and safety...we offer Them stability and comfort...it keeps Their lives in order... and once found... two people can't be apart from each other long before it starting to negatively affect them..."

The last two nights have been extremely hard for me... going to the club withour Ro.. and not having Him here to guide me. In my mind He is there... I could hear His whispers in my mind... but it isn't the same. It's hard to admit that I need someone.. and with all the commotion of late... it is still hard to admit... but it's becoming such a reality to me... such a driving force..

He has said it... that He needs me... over and over... I never believed it... figured He was saying it in the throes of passion... I've been so naive about it until now...

... and now that He isn't here when I need Him most.... I'm scared.

He said He'd be back though... He said He'd come back... He said it.

He wouldn't have said it if He had no plan on coming back, right?

mumblemumblemumble

I miss Daddy.

I'm scared that He isn't coming back. I want so badly to tell Him my fear.... but He needs the time, and His own space.... I can't push.... or bother Him with worrying about my feelings.

I've got my collar though. Thats a comforting thing in itself...

When will it stop hurting?

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